A long deserved updated..
It has been quite sometime since I have updated this blog and I have sorta forgotten about it until C recently mentioned..
Apparently C googled me and found it by chance.. I thought it was interesting to note that anyone would actually google my name..
Looking at my previous posts, alot has happened since.. I’m moving on, I’ve been working for almost 2 years already, Dan is getting married (today in fact!), Pink and Pam are getting married, I sang on stage for James’ wedding, I burnt myself with half mustard, Lenca’s in her 2nd relationship, I’ve been into 2 accidents, I bought myself my first car in Singapore, I’ve travelled to a few other countries, God has become much more of a reality, I’ve picked up smoking again, My works got published in 3 magazines, I won 2 design awards, I jumped into one wrong relationship, I’ve ridden to Laos and Cambodia, etc…
I was also just looking thru my mp3s and I found one of my fav Queen song; Pain is so close to Pleasure.. Here’s the lyrics:
Pain Is So Close To Pleasure
Ooh, ooh, pain is so close to pleasure, oh yeah,
Sunshine and rainy weather go hand in hand together all your life,
Ooh, Ooh, pain is so close to pleasure everbody knows,
One day we love each other then we’re fighting one another all the time,
When I was young and just getting started,
And people talked to me they sounded broken hearted,
Then I grew up and got my imagination
And all I wanted was to start a new releation,
So in love but love had a bad reaction,
I was looking for good old satisfaction,
But pain is all I got when all I needed was some love and affection,
Ooh, ooh, pain is so close to pleasure, yeah, yeah,
Sunshine and rainy weather go hand in hand together all your life,
Pain and pleasure, Ooh, Ooh, pain and pleasure,
When your plans go wrong and you turn out the light,
But inside your mind you have to put up a fight,
Where are the answers that we’re all searching for,
There’s nothing in this world to be sure of anymore,
But if you’re feeling happy someone else is always sad,
Let the sweetness on love wipe the tears from your facem
Ooh, ooh, pain is so close to pleasure, I told you so,
Sunshine and rainy weather go hand in hand together all your life,
Pain is so close to pleasure, yeah, yeah,
Sunshine and rainy weather go hand in hand together all your life,
All your life,
Pain - pleasure
Personally, I do not believe pain comes before pleasure but at this juncture in life, it’s more like pleasure is so close to pain.. My perception of pain being close to pleasure is as having sex after a heated arguement and this is one thing which not quite happening anytime soon for me. Thus, pleasure being so close to pain for me is more appropriate which better describes me: Ansley being led on to think that something (work, relationship, whatever) is working out fine until being dropped like a hot rivet once again.
I don’t know why I’m so defeated. I guess life has gotten the better of me. My smiles and laugher are no longer the genuine as before. I used to smile with my heart but now after the laughters, I see the frown within..
No, I’m not depressed. Alot of people will just say I’m going through my emo trip once again.. I don’t really know anymore, I’m hard wired this way I reckon. But hey, I don’t care what people say. Yes, it matters to me as I crave acceptance of others but my desire to be different is bigger than that craving!
Oh well, at least this part of me is still the same! =0)
